Friday, May 22, 2015

Friday

(Dustin Nippert is the highest paid player in the KBO.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady prepared chicken sandwiches for dinner.  The meal was good.  She smothered the meat in spicy barbecue sauce and served it on hot dog buns.  I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola.  I'm a huge fan of carbonated beverages.  The bubbles bring me joy.

I watched the Samsung Lions defeat the Doosan Bears 6 to 1.  The pitcher for Doosan was Dustin Nippert.  Dustin used to pitch in America, but things didn't work out.  No matter.  He currently earns $1,500,000 a year, making him the highest paid player in Korea.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I had a dream about my oldest son James-uh.  I kept calling him a knucklehead.  I can't remember his sin.  Sadly, this nightmare is certainly not shocking.  That child doesn't have a lick of common sense.  He drives me bat-shit crazy in real life, and now he haunts my sleep as well.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I refuse to live like some filthy atheist.  My life is gradually winding down.  Even my bones are beginning to ache with age and weariness.  So a relationship with the Living God is a soothing balm.

I woke up and 6 a.m. and turned on Fox News.  The Five discussed a gruesome murder in Washington D.C.  The killer showed zero mercy.  He even butchered a young boy while the child's parents helplessly watched.  I'm against the death penalty.  But scum like this should be pushed off a cliff.  So let it be written, so let it be done.

I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break.  There have been three reported cases of MERS in Seoul.  MERS is a Middle Eastern strain of influenza which boasts a 40% kill rate.  Great.  Something else to worry about.  The drama never ends.

Anyway, it's time for the song of the day.  Here's What's This Life For by Creed.  God Bless.

Thursday, May 21, 2015

Thursday

(Alfredo Figaro pitches for Samsung.)

Yesterday, I ate apple pie for dinner.  The meal was delicious.  My wife bought the pie at Costco for thirteen dollars.  I washed it down with several glasses of generic cola.  I shouldn't splurge.  I'm officially classified as morbidly obese by the local medical community.  Sadly, Poor old Smith is living on borrowed time.  Oh well.  What's a boy to do?

I watched baseball.  The Samsung Lions defeated the Doosan Bears 25 to 6.  The winning pitcher was Alfredo Figaro.  He's from the Dominican Republic.  Mr. Figaro makes $600,000 a year.  That's great money.  I wish that I could throw a curve ball.  Baseball is great for stress.  I get lost in the sport.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  Nihilism doesn't float my boat.  I'm a Christian for selfish reasons.  Having a relationship with the Living God just makes me feel better.  Jesus is a bright beacon on a cold dark night.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I had a strange dream about my Oscar fish.  Bluce and I watched them devour many large gold fish with their razor-sharp teeth.  Scales were flying all over the fish tank, and the water was stained red with lots of blood.  Bluce laughed and laughed and laughed.

I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on Fox News.  The Five discussed Clinton's email scandal.  I'm not good at predicting political winners and losers.  However, I just can't see Hillary earning the nomination.  Even liberals despise her.  Elizabeth Warren will eventually throw her hat in the ring.  But what do I know?

I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break.  Ryu Hyun-Jin is out for the season.  His departure is a huge blow to the Los Angeles Dodgers.  Ryu was a solid third in the starting rotation.  The Dodgers might very well be screwed in their race for the pennant.

Anyway, it's time for the song of the day.  Here's Hurdy Gurdy Man by Donovan.  God bless.   

Wednesday, May 20, 2015

Wednesday

(Game of Thrones never fails to keep me entertained.)

Yesterday, the Dragon Lady served the same old slop.  That's right.  Pork and rice.  The poor woman hates me.  And who can blame her?  We've been together for 16 years, and she's just sick and tired of looking at my ugly face.  I didn't complain.  I ate every last morsel, then washed the meal down with several glasses of generic cola.  I remain an optimist.  Things could be much worse.  At least I wasn't born in Chad.

I watched Game of Thrones.  Sansa Stark is brutally raped by Roose Bolton.  To add insult to injury, Theon Greyjoy is forced to watch the obscene spectacle from the corner of the bridal chamber.  I love Game of Thrones.  I've never missed an episode.  People often complain that the show has no sense of decorum.  But piss on all the puritanical nay-sayers.  Those righteous pilgrims should view the Disney Channel and leave the adults alone.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some filthy nihilist.  I prayed for the continued good health of my family.  I try not to bother Jesus with crazy requests.  I've come to grips with the fact that the Children of the Rice will never make it into Harvard.  So what's a daddy to do?  Jump out a window?  I think not.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 8 a.m. and turned on Fox News.  The Five discussed the fall of Ramadi to ISIS.  They blamed the grim situation in Iraq on Obama.  I'm not a big supporter of this current president.  Never have been.  But he inherited this mess in the Middle East.  Iraq is now an Iranian puppet-state.  Plain and simple.  And it's our own damn fault.  We should have never removed Saddam from power.  I actually miss the crazy bastard.

I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break.  College graduates in Korea are having a difficult time finding employment.  Many are working in menial jobs to make ends meet.  There's a huge wage-gap on the peninsula.  The rich are getting richer while the poor fall deeper into economic oblivion.  This problem seems to be global.  I fear a gradual resurgence of Marxism.  But what do I know?

Anyway, it's time for the song of the day.  Here's Thank You by Led Zeppelin.  God bless.

Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Tuesday

(Biker scum commit murder in Texas.)
 
Yesterday, I had pork and rice for dinner.  The meal wasn't very good.  I'm not a big fan of rice.  But I didn't complain.  I just smiled and ate my vittles with a gleam in my eye and a song in my heart.  I'm wonderful that way.  I washed the food down with several glasses of generic cola.  Sadly, I'm far too poor to afford the good stuff.  Money doesn't grow on trees.

I tried watching Game of Thrones.  However, the Dragon Lady kept yelling at my unfortunate sons and spanking them with a wooden spoon.  She wants the boys to attend MIT or Harvard.  Many Asian mothers--true to their reputation--are completely bat-shit crazy.  In reality, my children are a couple of dullards.  They'd be lucky to get into clown college.  Don't get me wrong.  I still love them.  But why beat a dead horse?

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some filthy misanthrope.  I do my best to love my neighbor as myself.  Jesus is a powerful universal force.  If you invite him into your life, he'll show up and kick you right in the nuts.  No fooling.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I had a dream about attending a wild amusement park in Florida.  My mother was there.  I had to cross a vast swimming pool on a tight rope.  I was hundreds of feet in the air and kept falling into the water.  Yet my brains didn't splatter all over the place.  I was having a great time.

I woke up at 5 a.m. and turned on Fox News.  Neil Cavuto told the nation's poor to flush their food stamps down the toilet and take responsibility for their shitty lives.  I find that the boys at Fox often demonize the have-nots.  Most people collecting benefits are working  their fingers to the bone just to make ends meet.  Cavuto should set his sights on his bloodsucking buddies who work on Wall Street.  They literally stole trillions of dollars right from our pockets.

I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. Nine bikers were murdered at a restaurant in Waco, Texas.  I'm not surprised.  Bikers are bad news.  There's nothing cute or friendly about them.  Most are felons who'd gladly cut your throat for looking at them sideways.  It's best to give criminals a wide-birth.  If they come rolling into your favorite drinking establishment, pay the bill and leave.   

Anyway, it's time for the song of the day.  Here's Sweet Leaf by Black Sabbath.  Enjoy.   

Monday, May 18, 2015

Monday

(Frankie Edgar wins again.)

Yesterday, I took my family to a buffet.  We ate many plates of rice and raw fish.  We also had French fries, waffles, and egg rolls.  I washed the vittles down with several glasses of Coke.  The meal cost seventy dollars.  Living on the peninsula isn't cheap.  Food's actually quite expensive.

I watched the UFC.  Frankie Edgar won a decision over Uriah Faber in a five round bout.  The fight was a tad boring.  Both men respected each other so much so that they were a bit apprehensive about getting hit with counter-shots.  Consequently, they spent most of the match dancing around the ring.

I'm a big fan of the UFC.  Perhaps I'm white trash.  But I just can't get enough of the extreme violence that the organization offers a slob like me.  My favorite fighter is Jon Bones Jones.  However, he's facing a long suspension for hitting a pregnant woman with his car.  The poor girl broke her arm as a result of the accident.  Mr. Jones ran away on foot.  His next stop will be prison.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some dirty nihilist.  I asked the Almighty to protect my two sons.  Sadly, both my boys are a couple of dullards.  They need all the supernatural help they can get.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 5:45 a.m.  I drank coffee and turned on Fox News.  Chris Wallace grilled Mark Rubio.  Senator Rubio claimed that the Iraq war wasn't a mistake.  What a tool.  I'm voting for Elizabeth Warren.  I'm not a liberal.  But desperate times call for desperate measures.  At least she hates Wall Street.

I read the paper while taking a bathroom break.  The homosexual community in Seoul is having a parade to promote LGBT awareness.  Many conservative Korean churches are up in arms.  They want the queens to get back in the closet.  My opinion?  Give the fags a break.  They have the right to enjoy their lives, too.

Anyway,  it's time for the song of the day.  Here's God Will Cut You Down by Johnny Cash.  Enjoy.

Sunday, May 17, 2015

Sunday

 (Yoon Sung-Hwan is considered Samsung's ace.)

Yesterday, I had sweet and sour pork for dinner.  The meal wasn't one of the Dragon Lady's best efforts.  But I didn't complain.  I just smiled and ate my vittles like a good-natured retarded child.  Poor old Smith is wonderful that way.  The glass is always half-full at my humble abode.  I washed the meal down with several glasses of generic cola.  I'm a big fan of sugary soft-drinks.

I watched the Samsung Lions host the NC Dinos.  The pitcher for Samsung was a man named Yoon Sung-Hwan.  Many consider Yoon to be the ace of the squad.  He makes nearly $800,000 a year.  That's great money.  The Lions were defeated 9 to 7However, the team remains near the top of the standings.  They've won the championship four years running.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  After all, I'm not some filthy atheist.  But I'm old.  Kneeling is getting harder and harder.  Soon, I won't be able to get up.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I had a strange dream about Ross Perot.  I was in the Marine Corp, and he was my drill instructor.  I passed his inspection with flying colors.  He was very impressed with my military bearing and gave me a hardy pat on the back.

I awoke at 8 a.m. and turned on Fox News.  Scott Walker is leading in Iowa.  I hope that Elizabeth Warren runs.  She's the only potential candidate who detests Wall Street as much as me.  The enemy of my enemy is my friend.

I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break.  A box full of human bones was found in an attic in the city of Incheon.  The police do not suspect foul play. The remains are being used for science and were merely misplaced.

It's currently 5:20 p.m.  Let's enjoy the song of the day.  Here's Creeping Death by Metallica.  So long for now, and God bless you all.  

Saturday, September 20, 2014

Taking a Break

 (Ever had one of those days.)

I've decided to take a break from writing.

Don't forget to visit my message board.

God bless.