(Dustin Nippert pitches for the Doosan Bears.)
Yesterday, the Dragon Lady went to Homeplus. She brought a pepperoni pizza back to our humble abode. It came in a large cardboard box. The meal was delicious. I love junk food. I washed the vittles down with several glasses of generic cola. Carbonated beverages bring me joy. The experience was heavenly.
I watched baseball on the tube. The Samsung Lions hosted the Doosan Bears in the city of Daegu. Doosan won the game 5-4. The starting pitcher for the Bears was a white man named Dustin Nippert. He used to play for the Arizona Diamondbacks, but things didn't work out. Mr. Nippert makes $470,000 a year. That's great money. Plus he loves his job. Talk about a blessing.
I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some filthy atheist. I asked Jesus to care for the health of my eldest boy James-uh. The poor kid's running a high fever with flu-like symptoms. In fact, his mother's taking him to the hospital as we speak.
I went to bed at midnight. I had a strange dream. I was put in charge of a company picnic. However, I had to borrow money in order to buy the meat. People complained that there wasn't enough food. To make matters worse, I didn't have a nickel to repay my debt. Everybody hated me.
I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank several cups of coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. The Korean police caught thirty foreigners selling and smoking marijuana. They'll end up serving jail time before being deported. Drugs are no laughing matter here in Asia. It's best to leave your stash at home.
I turned on Fox News. The president's playing too much golf. Even the New York Times is complaining about his aloof behavior. He does seem quite detached these days. But he's never been a passionate man. Obama's too cool for school. That's why the ladies love him.
Anyway, it's time to don our tinfoil hats. Here's a mega-rant by Alex Jones.