Sunday, May 31, 2015


(Matt Dillon still looks terrific.)

Yesterday, I took the family to McDonald's.  I enjoyed a Big Mac and French fries while my kids ate Chicken McNuggets.  I washed the meal down with a genuine glass of Coca-Cola.  Talk about heaven.  I'm a huge fan of junk food.  I'll probably die soon.  But what do I care?  I could use the rest.
I watched a show called Wayward Pines.  It stars Matt Dillon as a secret service agent who is trapped in a small town.  The town is controlled by a sadistic sheriff.  This perverted lawman--for some strange reason--loves ice cream.  He's frequently chomping on cones and smacking his lips.  Wayward Pines is a weird program.  However, I'm starved for entertainment, so I'll see it through to the bitter end.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some filthy nihilist.  I prayed for my wife.  The woman's a complete loon.  Her rage is insatiable.  In fact, she often embarrasses the children because she simply can't stop screaming.  I begged Jesus to cure her demons.  Trust me.  Poor Jesus has a lot on his plate.  Yet I'm confident that he's up to the job.

I went to bed at 11 p.m.  I dreamed about one of my old friends.  He wanted me to go drinking with him.  I told him no.  The guy was very disappointed.  He called me a sell-out to the man.

I woke up at 9 a.m. and turned on Fox News.  I watched an autobiography on Black Bart.  Bart hated Wells Fargo and spent a decade ripping off their wagons.  Sadly, the bankers eventually caught the guy.  He served nearly a decade in jail.  Wells Fargo sucked giant ass even back then.

I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break.  There are five new cases of MERS in Seoul.  I'm terrified of viruses.  I don't know why.  After all, my future is sealed.  It's my destiny to die of ass cancer.  I can feel it in my bones.

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's Moving In Stereo by The Cars.  God bless.

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