Thursday, July 16, 2015

Thursday

(Alone is a first-rate survival show.)

Yesterday, I made pork for dinner.  My eldest son didn't partake. He ate squid with the Dragon Lady at a local restaurant.  My meal tasted fantastic.  I cooked the meat using liberal amounts of grease and salt. Then I drank a large plastic bottle of beer to wash the vittles down.  My favorite Korean beer is Hite.  It tastes like a mixture of vinegar and cat piss.  But why complain?  Life's good. At least I wasn't born in Djibouti.

I watched the latest episode of Alone.  I'm a huge fan of survival shows.  One of the contestants drinks brackish water.  He gets sick and begins to go insane.  He claims to see colored lights and symbols as he looks at the roof of his tent.  The poor guy calls for the rescue team.  They evacuate him immediately for medical treatment.  Vancouver Island looks rough.  The place is awash with bears, cougars, and wolves.  I wouldn't spend a single night in that hell-hole.

I paid homage to the Christ God.  I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees.  No big surprise.  I'm not some dirty pagan.  I asked Jesus to preserve my crazy marriage.  I don't believe in divorce.  It's against my religion.  Besides, I want to spend the rest of my life torturing my poor bride for her many sins against me.  Divorce would only let her off the hook.  And I need my pound of flesh.

I went to bed at 10 p.m.  I didn't dream.  I woke up at 6 a.m. and turned on my laptop.  Obama made a pointed comment about Bill Cosby's legal troubles.  The president believes that it's morally wrong to drug and have sex with women.  He says that it's tantamount to rape. Wow.  He's really going out on a limb with that statement.  In all seriousness, I would never have pegged Cosby as a criminal pervert.  You could have knocked me over with a feather.

I read the newspaper later in the day.  Marriage in Korea is completely falling apart.  More than fifty percent end in divorce. The average time that a couple stays together is fourteen years.  I'm currently on my sixteenth year of matrimonial hell.  I probably deserve some type of prize.  Where is my Booby Award?

Anyway, it's time for the song du jour.  Here's Rusty Cage by Johnny Cash.  God bless.

8 comments:

  1. Now i'm in my 40's I am starting to understand why divorce happens so much particularly in Korea. After being married awhile a guy gets in his 40's and many of them work in large offices with late 20's women who haven't found their man yet, I'm stating the obvious but I'm surprised it doesn't happen more than it does. I think it was known about before but women just put up with their husband screwing some younger woman at the office. The dramas are basically this plot over and over but now the women are finding someone too. Korean women should be grateful for one thing marrying western guys, that we tend not to stray cause we are completely dependent on our wives here.

    James

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You have a point. But I'm butt-ugly. No woman in her twenties wants anything to do with me. Better to stick with the devil you know.

      Cheers.

      Delete
  2. Vancouver Island is RUGGED. I occasionally took the government-owned ferry boats over there after X#2 split back to San Francisco with the Prius. (A week after MY Canadian hospital salary finally paid it off, but I didn't care. I agreed to let her overweight, out-of-shape self have it because I can live just fine without a car.) I'd take my bicycle and as much clothing as I could stuff in my backpack and ride around for a day or two, staying in cheap motels at night. Beautiful place, full of woods and water, totally opposite to Australia. The further north you go, the wilder it gets. I never had any problem with toothy clawful animals, but I mostly stuck to the roads.

    As a matter of fact, the last trip I took with the X was on Vancouver Island. It was out 10th wedding anniversary in September 2012 and I booked a couple nights at a luxury waterfront lodge in Tofino, which is an honest-to-doG Canadian surfer's town way the hell up at almost-Alaskan longitude. We weren't there for the waves, just the northwoods scenery and great seafood. Things were rocky in the marriage -- she was always in an agitated depression and threatening to leave. We were staying at first-class places, seeing a fantastic part of the world, but she was still pissed off because it wasn't Paris. By the end of the mini-holiday, she announced that that was it, she was going to dump me and go back to where all her Deadhead friends live in S.F. I spent the next three months living in an atmosphere of icicles as she made arrangements to split.

    I can't say I was saddened. I didn't mourn the loss of a woman who was 1.) a decade older than me; 2.) chronically, morbidly miserable; and 3.) too post-menopausally dried-up and inflexible due to multiple bad joints to be any fun for fucking. She wasn't as damaging as my first X, the one who was borderline. But ultimately, Smithers, men cannot count on a modern woman having any loyalty. We must be self-sufficient in how we live, and how we feel. Because if we give any power over our physical existence or our emotions to a woman, it's as risky as handing control to Lloyd Blankfein.

    I think "FLB" is a good way to sign off this and future comments, as you do with "Cheers."

    FLB!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, if men don't get married, our species will die out. So we have to accept female lunacy. Being a homosexual is probably a lot more fun. But what's a boy to do?

      Cheers. And FLB.

      Delete
  3. Cooking for yourself on a Thursday is your reward Mr. Smith.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm actually starting to enjoy serving up slop to my son.

      Cheers.

      Delete
  4. Wow:16 years Smith. How do you endure it? The Nagging,Whining,Craziness of a Dragon Lady. By the way nice name for an Asian wife. Hats off to you Sir. Enjoy your blog. Found you on ZH.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for the kind words. I was born to endure. It's one of the few things I'm good at.

      Cheers.

      Delete

Thanks for stopping by. Smith.